Clive White’s Blog

Clivewhite.co.uk

Amazing breast trick.

Arkansas Scholars

Questions and answers selected from tests in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16 year old students! (Don’t laugh too hard – one of these may be the president someday.)
Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation [...]

Great artwork

Awsome arsework

Brain teaser

A 30 year old man married a 25 year old woman. She died at age 50
and her husband was so devastated that he cried for years. Ten
years after he stopped crying, he died. If he had lived to be 80,
how many years was he a widower?
Answer in comments

Man falls asleep in church

One day, Mrs. Jones visits her priest and tells him about her problem.
Mrs. Jones: Father, I have a small problem. My husbnad keeps falling asleep during your sermons. Can you do anything about it?
Priest: I see. Take this hatpin with you and once I have realized that Mr. Jones has fallen asleep, I’ll signal you [...]

Bill Gates

Famous birthdays on this day

1797 – Franz Schubert, composer (Unfinished Symphony)
1830 – James G Blaine, ‘Plumed Knight’
1872 – Zane Gray, American West novelist
1881 – Irving Langmuir, physical chemist/colloid researcher (Nobel ‘32)
1892 – Eddie Cantor, comedian
1902 – Alva Myrdal, Swedish pacifist (Nobel 1981)
1913 – Don Hutson, NFL end (Packers)
1913 – Wayne Millner, NFL end (Boston/Washington Redskins)
1914 – Jersey Joe [...]

Today in history

1849 – Corn Laws abolished in Britain
1851 – SF Orphan’s Asylum 1st in Calif founded
1862 – Telescope maker Alvin Clark discovers dwarf companion of Sirius
1871 – Birds fly over SF in such large numbers they actually darken sky
1911 – Congress names SF as Panama Canal opening celebration site
1945 – Eddie Slovik 1st [...]

How To Clean The Toilet

Instructions for cleaning a toilet :
1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
3. In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close both lids. [...]

Bowling

Would anybody notice if she got a strike

Top 10 Most Brilliant Marketing Screw Ups

1. Coors put its slogan, “Turn it loose,” into Spanish, where it was read as “Suffer from diarrhea.”
2. Scandinavian vacuum manufacturer Electrolux used the following in an American campaign: “Nothing sucks like an Electrolux.”
3. Clairol introduced the “Mist Stick”, a curling iron, into German only to find out that [...]

That Kodak moment

Not a great job, but someone’s got to do it

Modern nursery rhymes

Modern nursery rhymes

Modern nursery rhymes

Very Intresting Stuff

In the 1400’s a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb.
Hence we have ‘the rule of thumb’
——————————————-
Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled ‘Gentlemen Only…Ladies Forbidden’…and thus the word GOLF entered into [...]

Blonde parents

Morris and Becky were delighted when finally
their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end.
The adoption center called and told them they
had a wonderful Russian baby boy and the couple
took him without hesitation.
On the way home from the adoption center, they
stopped by the local college so they each could
enroll in night courses.
After they [...]

A new year wish

That Kodak moment

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