Clive White’s Blog

Clivewhite.co.uk

Optical illusions

OK.. who saw the number 10 in the background
Hands up how many people spotted the snake
I am told there is a dog in this picture I can’t see it myself
How long did it take you to see the stream in the background
Somewhere in this picture there is a woman posing in a bikini
How long did [...]

Saucy british postcards….(from the archives)

If I Had My Life To Live Over!…..(from the Archives)

I would have talked less and listened more.
I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained and the sofa faded.
I would have eaten the popcorn in the “good” living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.
I [...]

Great moments in Physics….(from the archives)

The following concerns a question in a physics degree exam at the University of Copenhagen.
“Describe how to determine the height of a skyscraper with a barometer.”
One student replied:
“You tie a long piece of string to the neck of the barometer, then lower the barometer from the roof of the skyscraper to the [...]

From the archives

The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that [...]

Harvey Andrews….(A tribute to Sandra Scheuer)

A soldier shooting a subversive student in the back was seen (at the time…) as fair play, by a narrow majority.
A student blocking a soldier’s gun (with a flower…) was seen as a violent, punishable act.
A tribute to Sandra Scheuer.

Sgt Michael Willets was awarded the George Cross for his bravery…….( from the archives)

Sgt Michael Willets was awarded the George Cross for his bravery . The song by Harvey Andrews tells the story ,Harvey Andrews one of my favourite singers from the seventies..

Harvey Andrews….(From the Archives)

Harvey Andrews at Acoustic Routes Cambridge. A song about a soldier going off to the Somme in the first world war saying goodbye to his love/

From the archives….cartoons.

To all my readers

I am very sorry to say that due to ill health I will not be posting for the forseeable future I would like to thank everybody for their comments, and emails
hope to post soon.

Here’s A Concise Sex Manual For Computer Experts:

1. Be user friendly
2. Take bytes
3. Fondle joystick
4. Spread sheet
5. Fix surge protector
6. Activate hardware
7. Insert disc, all the way
8. Do it ’til it megabytes
9. Back it up
10. Eject floppy

There are three men in the bathroom,

There are three men in the bathroom, two Englishmen and an Australian. All are at the urinals.
The first Englishman zips up and walks over to the sink and uses a lot of soap and water and before he leaves. He says to the others, “In Yorkshire, I learned to be clean and [...]

US man tried to revive roadkill (yes, he was drunk)

A US man who tried to revive some roadkill – a long-dead possum, specifically – has been charged with public drunkenness after his mouth-to-mouth misdemeanour on a highway.

Baby ring-tailed possums, safe from drunk roadkill-revivers
Police said a number of witnesses saw 55-year-old Donald Wolfe tending to the opossum (that’s the [...]

Thought for the day

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.

A riddle

Highlight the space between the asterisks & the Riddle Answer will appear…
Was Rome built in a day?
* No – it was built in Italy *

Weird X-rays: Top bizarre body-based finds

It was only a matter of time before an airport worker got done for ogling an unsuspecting female’s lady lumps via one of those new-fangled body scanners. Cue a look back through some of the other weirdest X-ray exposures out there…

Ten-year-old Dalmatian collie Dixie needed emergency surgery to remove Homer from [...]

Christmas Party

What did the guest sing at the Eskimo’s Christmas party ?
Freeze a jolly fellow !
What party game did Jekyll like best ?
Hyde and Seek !
Did you hear about the man who went to the fancy dress party as a bone ?
A dog ate him in the hall !
What would you do if you [...]

Have you met the twins

The naughty joke

A husband comes home from work on Friday and says to his wife “you got three choices and have to chose one. You can go camping with me this weekend, give me a blowjob, or get fucked up the ass”.
Wife thinks and replies: “I hate camping with you. Getting fucked up the [...]

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